Monday, September 30, 2013

Another couple of weeks

I am so absolutely ready to be done with this wound vac. I have had it for over a month now. And at my last visit to the wound care center I asked the doctor how much longer I would have it. He said another couple of weeks... I seem to remember someone saying that to me a couple of weeks ago...
Tomorrow is Monday so Juanita comes (she is my home health nurse) and my mom will come sit with Si while she changes my wound dressing.

I really look forward to being normal again one day... this is so very tiresome...

Thursday, September 26, 2013

Bottles

I am sitting on the bed, holding Si and rocking him. He woke up at 3 wanting a bottle and since it had only been just over 3 hours since his last bottle, I made him a 4 ounce bottle instead of a 5 or 6 ounce one. 

I wish I had blogged more when Janie was this age. So I could compare more... I know that I shouldn't compare my children, but there are so many things I cannot remember. Little things. Like how old she was when I upped her bottles from 4 ounces to 5 or 6.

Jason's mom thinks we should try putting Si to sleep on his stomach and maybe that would help him to sleep better... because of him having his days and nights mixed up. But after going through him crying for hours during the day, him being mixed up on days and nights isn't as big of a deal to me...
Yesterday was the first day out of the previous 6 days that Si didn't cry for at least 3 hours.

And I'm not talking about that mindless tearless screaming that newborns do randomly in short bursts when they are cold or hungry.

This was a gut wrenching, fearful cry that actually produced tears that streamed down his beautiful cheeks. The kind of cry that hurts a mother's heart because she cannot figure out what to do to help her baby stop hurting. 

So I am dine with being up with him in the middle of the night. If that's what it takes to keep him from crying during the day. 

At least there's usually Law & Order reruns on all hours of the night somewhere on satellite ;)

Sunday, September 22, 2013

Sleep

I have spent the majority of today asleep. Si has been having problems with his tummy :( and I stayed up all night with him night before last and I was up all day yesterday also because of going to Mobile.
It has been a long past few days...

Jason has taken care of Si all day. And I just laid him down.

So I am going to try to go back to sleep. Because I have a feeling he won't be asleep all night...

Wednesday, September 18, 2013

Stroller

So... yesterday I made my first excursion out of the house with Si without having Jason with us. We went to the school to turn in the sick leave request. I decided to take the stroller so that I could just stroll Si around instead of carrying him the whole time.

It was a good idea, in theory anyway...

Since I picked up the stroller to put it in my car and to get it out of my car, I haven't been able to move as freely today. I haven't been experiencing hardly any pain for over a week and this is a sharp stabbing burn in my abdomen.

From one side to the other and all throughout my incision. 

So... yeah...

Not my best idea as of late...

Tuesday, September 17, 2013

Sick leave request

I finally finished the letter I am turning in to the board requesting my coworkers to donate sick leave days so that I can stay off from work...

On August 10, 2013 I had a C-section. Initially, the surgery went smoothly and Si was born at 11:32 am. That evening around 7 o'clock I was in more pain than I have ever experienced in my life. I had every nurse on the floor in my hospital room at one time. They even called the doctor who had performed the C-section back to the hospital because of the amount of pain I was in. After four hours of crying, begging, having an anxiety attack, and my blood pressure plummeting to 65/30, they determined that I had a hematoma in between two of the layers of stitches. 

I was told that they were hopeful that the hematoma would resolve itself over time. This is not, however, how things worked out. I was released from the hospital on Wednesday, August 14th. By Friday, August 16th my incision had started to pour blood. I went back to the doctor on Tuesday, August 20th and found out that the hematoma that formed the night that Si was born after my C-section has burst through my incision. And that is where the blood has been coming from. I also found out that it will take much longer for me to heal from this surgery because instead of remaining sewn together, the doctor had to cut through most of my stitches and pull out as much of the old blood from the hematoma as possible and pack the wound with gauze. And my husband has to help me by packing the incision with gauze two to three times a day.

I went back to the doctor on Thursday, August 22nd for her to try to scoop out the blood from the hematoma. Very painful is an understatement. After laying there through agony for about 5 minutes (which I promise seemed much longer than 5 minutes) she asked me about having surgery the following morning to get the rest of the blood out. This means I would be put to sleep and she would really be able to get in there and clean all of it out. So I was scheduled for out-patient surgery at 8:30 the following morning, Friday, August 23rd.

After being home for less than 24 hours, the home health nurse called the hospital to have me re-admitted for pain management and to be outfitted with a wound-vac. I was also given 4 units of blood because my hemoglobin level had fallen to 5 (a normal level is 12). I have fought off two infections through all of this. I have been admitted to the hospital a total of 3 separate times. A home health nurse comes to see me at my house every Monday and Wednesday to change the gauze from my open C-section incision and re-hook up my wound vac. Every Friday I make a trip to Mobile to the Wound Care Center to see the doctor there and have them re-evaluate my incision and redress my wound. 

I have been told by the doctor at the Wound Care Center, that I will need a minimum of 2 more months off from work, and I will exhaust my sick leave well before that time comes. I hope to return to work by November 6th. I would much rather return to work healthy than stay where I am presently, but to make that return a reality, I would really appreciate any donated days my colleagues would be willing to spare during this difficult time. 

Monday, September 16, 2013

Gotta love technology

Today was definitely a Monday. My cell phone service was completely gone this morning. Which meant that I couldn't get in touch with the home health nurse to find out when she would come to my house. It also meant that I didn't know when or if I could take a shower before she showed up. AND I couldn't call my mom to come stay with Si so that I could take a shower and have the nurse change my wound dressing. 

Thankfully I was able to use Facebook to contact my sister-in-law and get her to call my mom for me.
Gotta love technology :) even when it causes problems you wouldn't have had without it ;)

♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡♥♡

I remember missing Janie being a little baby that I could rock to sleep. I absolutely adore rocking Si :) 

Granted, I adore it most when I am well rested and least when I am tired. Such as between the hours of midnight and 5 am.

;)

Days and nights

Si has his days and nights mixed up... and it is becoming miserable for me... now that Jason has gone back to work I am the one who must get up and stay up with him in the middle of the night. It should be easier than this, I swear...

I have started driving again. It had been over a month since I last drove anywhere. It felt strange to be driving again. I was so uber careful I'm sure I aggravated the people behind me because of my lack of speed ;)

According to the doctor and nurses at the wound care center I am healing at a very fast rate. I have got the letter for the school board asking for coworkers to donate sick leave days to me almost ready and I hope to finish it tomorrow. This blog helped me tremendously in writing it. I was able to pull from the writings right after Si was born for most of it.

I had better get some sleep while Si is asleep. Maybe tonight will be better...

Wednesday, September 11, 2013

Photog slacker...

Si is one month old today. I haven't even taken my camera out of its case in over a month. That should prove how sick I have been... I have taken pictures with my phone but it just isn't the same. Maybe tomorrow I will take a one month shot of Si... 

I am starting to feel like a slacker... in more ways than just a photog slacker...

Sunday, September 8, 2013

Walking

Tomorrow Jason goes back to work. He has been off with me for the past four weeks. It will definitely be different without him here, but I'm sure I can handle it :)

The home health nurse is scheduled to come tomorrow so I will need someone here to stay with Si while she changes the dressing on my incision. Either Jason will come home then or his mom will come over. Both Si and I have doctor appointments on Wednesday in Mobile and then I have to go back to the wound care center in Mobile on Friday. I can already tell there is an air leak around the port for the vac this time. It started yesterday and has gotten a little more noticeable today. I am hopeful that it holds until the nurse comes tomorrow. 

We went walking today. Just up the street and back but it was a good feeling just to be outside for a change.

So much more

I just laid Si down from rocking him to sleep after he finished his bottle. Jason is asleep beside me. He goes back to work on Monday. So I will be doing all of this on my own. He has been getting up with Si every night since he was born because of how sick I have been. He really is an awesome daddy :)

Still no word on my sick leave. I need to contact the insurance company about my short-term disability... since this whole ordeal has been much more than a routine c-section. Maybe they will agree to pay me more than the standard 8 weeks. I sure hope they do.

I remember after Janie was born being ready to go back to work. I think becoming a mom was overwhelming for me then. Also having to do so much by myself because her daddy was always gone working away from home didn't help much either. But this time I am not anywhere near being ready to go back.

I would love to be a stay at home mom. I do miss the people at school. But I live being here so much more :)

Friday, September 6, 2013

17.5 centimeters

I had an appointment at the wound care center today. It went much smoother than last week. No tears at all today. The pain has become much mire bearable than it was in the beginning and I can move around so much easier. It is amazing how much better I am now. Last Friday my incision measured 20.5 centimeters across. Today it measured 17.5 centimeters across. It has closed 3 whole centimeters!! Which is awesome!!

The depth of the wound in the center is 6 cm which is about the same as it was last week. And the goal of all of this is for it to heal from the inside out without leaving any voided space that could become a problem later (such as an abscess).

I am still looking at being off from work for 2 more months. And I don't even know if my sick leave has been approved... I simply cannot go back to work like this. I surely hope that it is approved soon...

Today I took the breastfeeding pump I had rented back to the store. It kinda made me sad... to know that I really absolutely would not be pumping any more. I had wanted so badly to do it this time. But it just didn't work out that way...

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Looking forward

I sincerely look forward to being able to walk around my home without having to unplug this wound-vac.

I look forward to being able to go into the Post Office without having to worry about people staring at me because of this clear tubing that runs from under my shirt to the little black purse I constantly carry on my left shoulder.

I look forward to not having to wait for the days that the home health nurse is coming for me to be able to take a shower.

I look forward to the day that I can go to Mobile with Jason for a reason other than a doctor's appointment or hospital admission.

And I will never forget this journey. Because I have learned a great deal about myself and about the people closest to me. Some good, and some bad. But I think I have learned the most about myself.

Sunday, September 1, 2013

Antibiotic

The doctor at the wound care center was blown away that I'm not taking an antibiotic to prevent infection. But that also means that some of the medicine could get into the breast milk that I pump for Si. So it looks like I won't be pumping much longer...

He said I could continue to give Si the milk, but I would have to watch him closely and check for signs of a rash...

Nope.

It's not worth making him sick. I've been able to pump and give him milk for 3 weeks. And that's all I can do. It does make me sad, though. I had really wanted to do this. But pumping also puts a strain on my body and could cause it to take longer to heal.

So it makes sense to stop, right?